Visiting the 鈥淲hitt/Kraus Fine Art Store at Seaport Village, was a breathtaking experience. I felt in love with all the paintings. My first purpose of going was to earn some extra points for the class. My feelings just at the entrances of the gallery were wonderful, I walked carefully around each beautiful art and observed with my most attention and searched for the one I need to choose, but for my surprise the painting choose my. I have seen many beautiful art pieces because my husband鈥檚 family makes gold leaf frames and they buy a lot paintings, but there is no comparison to the next painting that we see. When I saw the painting Arbol de la Vida by Fidel Garcia it took my complete attention because this painting has a very intense balances of successful divine consequences and unsuccessful divine consequences. What I mean by this is that she looks like Eve from the bible were she is expose to God after she and Adam disobeyed God, but she鈥檚 alone in the picture in the bible the story is told that Adam does not deal with his consequences manly, but blames Eve for the wrong doing, so here I see that Eve is left alone with her blame not accusing Adam for her wrong doing, but standing with her open arms like telling God that she well bear with her bad penalty.
No comma in the first sentence but there are other problems besides comma use. Your sentences are wordy and often are run-on sentences. An example of a problem I see is "Adam does not deal with his consequences manly" -- how does one deal with consequences manly? It does not make sense.
Read your essay out loud - you will catch many errors. commas are like breathes
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