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| *SoulEyes Photography>>>Art Gallery |
I have written a poem about one painting, would you tell me how this sounds? |
take a look at the painting here http://www.impressionist-art-gallery.com... "Terrace at Sainte-Adresse" This is how I want, This is what I need, My 鈥淥ne Fine Day鈥?to be. While she was talking, All I could see was: Two inviting red lips. Her impressions moisten my dry, desert tensions. She bathed me with her warm breath. I felt what it feels to be, sitting under a humid sun. As the wind is touching, Every single blade of grass, Every petal of flower, I find this touch, like her long and heavy breath. These little, huge, living, dying, playing waves, Are the blue prints of desires dancing in her eyes. When I see doubt in her eyes, I find these clouds above my skies. This is how my 鈥淭errace at Sainte-Adresse鈥?feels to be, Just like sitting under her carefree smile. Very pretty, why not send to a publishing house for more feedback? I'm grooving on it. The line "I felt what it feels to be, sitting under a humid sun" is a bit awkward compared to the rest of that stanza. Good work. |
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