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| *SoulEyes Photography>>>Child Photographer |
This is an essay I wrote for writing class let me know what you honestly think? |
Worth a Thousand Words Desolate, dusty, vacant, hot, and hungry. These are a few words that come to mind while describing this photograph. When I look at this photograph, I see sadness, and suffering. It breaks my heart. There is a small child lying in a make shift tent, on a dirty dusty field. The child seems to be suffering from malnutrition, judging by the size of his head, compared to his tiny body. The vacant field seems to go on forever, like an endless sea. With no indication of water or shelter from trees, to block the pounding heat from the bright sun. It looks as if the baby is alone, but off in the faint distance it seems there may be someone there. But without clarity the photograph keeps you wondering. I believe the photographer captured the emotion that these people feel. Their hardships and heartaches they have been through. I believe he was trying to reach the compassionate side of people by showing the youngest victims. And letting the observers know that not only adults have been affected, but mothers, fathers, children and even babies have been uprooted from everything they know. Without knowing the history of this photograph, it may be interpreted completely different. It may seem like the family is on a picnic, or went for a walk, and the baby was tired so they made a tent for him to nap in. The mother may be nearby taking the photograph, and a sibling may be playing off in the distance. There is a saying "A picture is worth a thousand words." I believe this photograph, like many photographs sets a good example for this phrase. Without knowing the history, the photograph is open to many interpretations and perspectives. One who has not been through many hardships may see a more positive perspective, and one who has had nothing but Hughes 2 heartaches, may see a more negative or emotional perspective. Maybe the photograph triggers memories from one's own life good or bad. It could even be the smallest detail that triggers an emotion that you have experienced. This photograph for instance, brings me sadness, the child laying there alone with his tiny body and larger head, reminds me of a premature baby. Which is something I have faced in my past, so this photograph brings me painful memories. This may be why I was drawn to this particular photograph. There are also some photographs that may not capture your attention, they may seem emotionless, or bland. There may not be anything in the photograph that you can personally relate to. It is amazing how many interpretations can be made from a seemingly plain photograph, you have to challenge yourself to really find the meaning, or reasoning behind the picture. What is the photographers intent? Who was it intended for? Was it planned or spontaneous? These are some questions you should keep in mind when analyzing photographs. You should take time to see and describe every detail, because there may be a small, yet seemingly insignificant detail in the picture that could help find the meaning behind the photograph. So in conclusion, you make the picture. With your own interpretations and experiences, you put yourself, and personal challenges, or triumphs into what you see in a photograph. Where one sees happiness, another may see sadness. It just depends on what you are looking for, and the amount of history you know about the photograph. Sentence fragments, use of personal pronouns, using the same word/idea often times, comma splices, etc. I'd give it a C if I were feeling generous and a D if I was feeling ornery. In any case, this needs some serious polishing and a rewrite in more than one area. I don't know about your teacher, but my teacher doesn't want us writing in first person (I , we , we're,), she says its not the proper way for writing a formal essay. Instead we use "one" so instead of the sentence "I see sadness", I have to write "one may see sadness"... I know its gay your teacher may not mind you doing that. Yeah and like the guy said below me a lot of sentence fragments It's good! Here are a few suggestions: Change the beginning sentence to include the name of the photographer and the title of the photograph instead of referring to it as "this photograph", it makes the essay begin in a more professional note. Take out the phrase "it seems." It's passive, not assertive. Change those phrases to things like "the person in the picture is BLANK, which evokes BLANK," or, "the BLANK in the picture creates a BLANK" feeling...you get the picture. (No pun intended. haha) Lastly, take out the phrase "I believe." It's overused, and an essay should be about your professional interpretation, not what you "believe," which makes it sound like an emotion that you feel, and not a valid opinion on a subject matter. I hope that these suggestions help. Good luck- you seem to have a great start! |
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